Job Related Program: Terase

how do you translate terase in english?
i felt? i feel?
don't bother....

anyway,
today like usual,
its become my job to make the morning's drink for my boss,
and like usual i went to our pantry to make them...
and because i'm such a klutz,
the drink spilled all around the water dispenser...
but not all of them...
only splashed here and there...
and it's only plain water~
some was spilled into the box...
below the water container area,
i spilled a few drops of the drinks,
but i dropped into the container not on the carpet or on the wall!!

and when that happen i said;
"aaa... komatta na... sokay, after i send this drink i will clean this up"
so i went and deliver(apekah deliver) the drink,
and when i went back to clean the place,
yes is this totally like her!!
i can swear, but i won't ,
that she look exactly like that 
when she saw the pantry...
she didn't know i was behind her..
and when she saw me she begin to said why i did this..
you see she said...
not asked...
"why do you spilled drinks here?"
"this is not a sink, we can't wash our hand here.."
"the other day you do it too, now you do them again."
"we must cooperate to make sure this is clean."
"every morning i came, i make sure i clean this thing(water dispenser) now look"
"don't do this again.."
"if you are too lazy to clean the spoon in the toilet leave them be and i'll clean them.."
"rasa jijik tengok camni.."

i was speechless...
seriously?
this long speech just because i spilled water into the supposed to be 
the place for me to drop the water?

and you mention how i did it again...
the 1st time i dropped them on purpose..
yeah!
i like to drop water here and there,
so people can see i'm such a dirty little girl~
you happy?

it was an accident for god sake!!
and you can just clean them in the toilet..
or like you said,
 every morning you clean them,
so eventually you will also clean them rite...
why make it such a big deal??
if you don't want to do it,
let me do it...
said it to my face...

i didn't intentionally do it!
the hot water fell on my hand,
accidentally i dropped the mug~
you i think i purposely dropped it?
supposely i kena tahan the hot water,
so that the water stays in the mug,
even though my hand punyala sakit?

i can understand that you don't like the place to be messy..
but isn't that why we hired you??
to make this place clean?
if we all 'gaman' ourself and never make anything dirty,
serupa you tak kerja kat sinilah....

supposely you don't like me spilling the water,
don't bother clean it!~
i will clean them myself~
i already did half of them, 
but decided to deliver the water 1st...
i know my responsibility...

i just can't believe you take me as a dirty person~
jijik!~
you think i live in a dustbin ke?
then after lunch when you saw me with a water on my hand,
automatically you look at the pantry,
look at the dispenser...
seriously??
like seriously??
why?
you ingat i ambek air i banjirkan pantry ke?
aiyo~

even when others keep telling me to leave the dishes,
because it's your job to clean them,
i said it's okay, i can do it..
if i am such a dirty person,
i will just leaves the dirty dishes there..

it's give me such anger,
that you would put me into that kind of class!~
stop talking!!
stop talking!!
stop talking to me!!!

you spoiled my good mood!~
do you know!!
when i saw your face~
you look at the pantry with disgusted and angry emotion...
if i didn't show up,
will you bad-mouthing me there...
will you?!
i know you will,
because i saw your mouth moving...

though you said all these things nicely...
but i can't feel it...

truthfully,
i can take the advice you are giving me..
or if you want me to be more careful...
but the way you said it...
'jijik'
how you think i feel when you said it to my face?
of course you don't know,
you don't think rite..
you see me like i such a goody-goody girl,
can bully me rite~

just say it nicely to me..
i never shout to people...
except my family XDD
i never get angry at people...
except my family XDD
i never fight with people
except my family XDD


okay seems like i fight a lot with my family...
but that's what families do...
we fight, made up, and fight again...
despite all that,
our loves grow stronger and stronger 
each minutes~

you!
i don't mention names...
but if you happen to come across this blog while surfing the net...
jangan nak perasan sangat boleh!~
its not you! XDDD


anyway,

today i fell extra moody because of this incident..
it makes me feel stupid..
even small things pun i cannot do...
and even you want to scold me...
to thinks we have such a close relationship...
i should not be so nice...
that way people won't think i can accept any kind of words thrown at me...
i have a very sensitive heart...
cepat terase hati ni...


so for tomorrow,

i hope i won't do this kind of things again..
and i hope,
i don't see you tomorrow~
it's makes me mad everytime i remember the morning incident...


but still,
thank you for tegur me...
alhamdulillah,
still got people to scold me..
and yes,
i will try to change for the better...


but hey,

can't blame a girl if she wants to express her feeling!

hopefully tomorrow will be a better day
than today...




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